Why I'm Writing [again]

Day 2 of the #10daysbetterblog challenge.

I’m exhausted. Not from the writing, not from much of anything besides the days’ activity of work, but also of the unending lists of things I’d like to accomplish, at some point in some faraway land.

It seems like my overwhelm comes from anticipating what’s to come and what needs to be done. Day by day and consistency is the key.

Oh, and accountability. I’m terrible at that.

A new leaf is turning, though. I’ve called in reinforcements. My friend Dan McGuigan, whom I admire for his tenacity and super fun good nature, recently left public accounting and is on a journey I can relate to. You can find his writing over at Being Bold. Personally, Dan, I’m loving these posts as they get queued up in LinkedIn.

Another is the future award-winning author, Daniel Egan. I don’t like to define human beings by what they do, but this Dan really likes that fun intersection between behavioral finance and investment technology. I’m lucky to call this Dan my current co-worker, and I’m even luckier to call the first Dan a former co-worker.

All that to say is FAR is in 7 weeks and I am in the doldrums of analysis paralysis. I’m aiming to take it, and eeking (that’s not a word, is it? but you know what i mean) by with a passing score. If not, close to passing. I’ve had FAR jitters for years. To make an accurate assessment, I would say 70% of my anxiety is due to the psychology of preparing for FAR as opposed to, you know, actually preparing for it.

This is where the Dans come in. The Dans are going to help keep me accountable. McGuigan doesn’t know it yet, but seeing that we already have a call scheduled tonight to discuss goals (ugh, which, a part of me hates, because I’m sort of all about this philosophy), he’ll get all the 4-1-1 soon. The no-goal approach is my jam to the end, but where I fall short is the action part.

This is why I’m writing. For the brain dumps, and for the accountability. But, phantom accountability, please, because I hate publicly failing. Admitting failure sucks, but not trying is even worse.

Let’s live out our permission to fail, friends. Just do work.